


I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings

by maddie_55



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet, Emotional, Flashbacks, Fluff, M/M, Sad, idk what else to tag this tbh, it's sad but kinda bittersweet, lots of feels (i hope)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-27
Updated: 2016-05-27
Packaged: 2018-07-10 12:12:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6984577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maddie_55/pseuds/maddie_55
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I wanted to do that for you Bucky. I knew you’d do the same. You’ve always been my best friend, the love and light of my life. I can’t lose you. I may have been a caged bird, but I was singing the whole time”</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my first work since 2014, so dang. It is kinda short, so I apologize, I just wanted to get back into the writing zone again. Comments are greatly appreciated. For my next story, I was thinking of doing some hot, kinky sex stuff with Steve and Bucky, so what would you guys like to see? I was thinking of daddy kink but idk if this fandom is keen on that so suggestions would be great.   
> Hope you guys enjoy this story at least

Steve has been punched, kicked, thrown, and threatened. He has had to pin teammates – _friends_ – against each other. But nothing has ever hurt him more than this. Nothing has ever, will ever, pierce his skin and dig into his heart like this.

“I just can’t do this anymore, Steve. I’m so sorry”

_“Steve, I just can’t do this anymore” Bucky whimpers, voice cracking all over the place as he is holding back burning tears._

_“Bucky, you can. You won’t be alone. I’m here” Steve was gripping Bucky’s thigh gently, fighting to keep himself and his emotions together. The last thing both he and Bucky needed was Steve going off the deep-end while Bucky was upset._

_“But I need to be alone. Hydra, they fucked me up. I will never truly be Bucky again. He’s long gone, and I don’t want to compromise you or your happiness. You’ve done enough Steve”_

_“Baby, no, you may not be the same but you’re still the Bucky I fell in love with, that I want to be with more than anything. Hydra will never hurt you again as long as I am here” Steve reassured Bucky, unable to keep his eyes off of Bucky. Despite the foreboding circumstances, he couldn’t help but be in awe of how utterly gorgeous James ‘Bucky’ Barnes truly was._

_“Please let me stay” Steve begged, his eyes now welling up with hot tears of his own. Bucky finally looked up at Steve with red eyes and wet cheeks._

_“Okay”_

 

 

“Why? What’s going on? Are you okay? Bucky?” Steve bombarded him with questions, not taking the words totally serious as he has always been able to talk Bucky out of it before. Bucky was probably just going through some harsh emotions right now. Sometimes, Bucky still had flashbacks and memories of Hydra, what they did to him, and what he did to others. It was never in Bucky’s nature to hurt anyone – in fact, Steve knows just how much his past actions haunt him to this day.

Bucky must know that wasn’t him, and that everyone now knows it wasn’t him who had control over his actions.

(Bucky does. It still haunts him.)

“Steve, don’t make this harder on anyone, please” Bucky sighs, running his hand up and down his metal arm. He does that absentmindedly when he’s upset, or when he knows he has upset Steve.

 

 

_“Bucky, baby, what the fuck was that out there?” Steve spoke eerily calm._

_“It was nothing, I just kissed someone’s cheek. It’s not like I made out with them, shit” Bucky explained defensively, his hand slowly moving up his metal arm._

_Steve stalked slowly closer to Bucky, and uncrossed his arms. In one breath, he grabbed both of Bucky’s wrists and pushed him up against the wall with his hands about his head._

_“Steve…”_

_“Why the fuck did you ever think it was okay to do that? Even so much as touch someone else. Don’t you know you belong to me?” Steve hissed into Bucky’s ear, while both of their dicks were slowly rising up._

_“It wasn’t like that, you know that. Please”_

_“Please what, huh?” Steve shoved Bucky further into the wall, if that was possible. Bucky whimpered._

_“Please, Steve. Please, fuck me” Bucky whispered, as if he were out of breath._

_“Fuck you? Oh baby, you don’t even have to ask. I am going to tear you apart”_

_Bucky whined in pleasure._

_“Not that you deserve it. But now you got me worked up and wanting to punish you. And I really want fuck your ass so hard you won’t be able to walk in the morning. Maybe that will teach you to go around touching or kissing other people huh?” Steve breathed the words into Bucky’s neck, his dick shoved right up against Bucky’s thigh, craving Bucky so profusely._

_“Yes Steve, I want you to tear my ass in two” Bucky said submissively, but it was still the truth. And with Steve having inhuman strength, it was definitely a possibility. That only turned on Bucky more._

_“You should know better not to call me Steve by now baby. Don’t make me punish you more than I already have to” Steve said playfully, with a hint of venom. He was running his fingers roughly through Bucky’s hair._

_“Sir, I’m sorry”_

_“That’s better. You ready to have your brains fucked out, baby?”_

_“Yes, sir. Okay.”_

 

 

“What do you mean? Bucky I – “ But Steve was cut off.

“This isn’t fair to me, or you. I love you more than anything Steve. You know that, right?” Bucky pleaded with his eyes, truly wanting Steven to know how much Steve really did mean to him.

“What’s not fair? I’m not understanding Buck” Steve scrunched his eyebrows together. His heart rate picked up.

“You need to live your life. You’re a goddamn superhero, isn’t that what you always wanted? You have a chance to save people who deserve it, who still have a chance to be good and redeem themselves” Bucky’s voice was sharp, but Steve could see through the façade. It was a slight comfort to know that this was as hard for Bucky as it was for Steve.

“After all we’ve been through? You’re going to throw that all away? You don’t need to do this” Steve yelled at Bucky, unable to remain calm anymore.

“You’ve done all you can for me, and more. More than I deserved. But now, I want you to be yourself and live out what you were born to do Steve” Bucky’s voice waivered a bit, but he was trying to hold on to himself before he burst at the seams.

“Why are you doing this to me?” His voice broke, and he was too consumed with sadness to even raise his voice anymore.

“You’ve done so much for me, you’ve sacrificed too much for me. You’ve spent your whole life as a caged bird. Trying to save me, trying to help me. I can never repay you for what you did. But I’m going to try” Bucky stated, determination in his voice. Usually, it’d make Steve proud. But this only makes him scared.

“I wanted to do that for you Bucky. I knew you’d do the same. You’ve always been my best friend, the love and light of my life. I can’t lose you. I may have been a caged bird, but I was singing the whole time” Steve begged, and he was wondering if he should literally get on his knees. That may be a bit too dramatic.

 

 

_“This is all so beautiful” Bucky looked around in awe._

_They were outside, on a bench facing the calm lake. Street lamps that lit the secluded path reflected off the water, creating patches of gold throughout the lake._

_(Steve would never admit, but he had rented the whole area so Bucky could just admire the scenery in peace and quiet)_

_“You’re beautiful” Steve gripped Bucky’s jaw and turned his head to he was able to give Bucky a kiss. Bucky giggled, and it was the sweetest sound Steve had ever heard. He had to smile in response._

_Bucky continued looking out onto the lake, face and body both relaxed. His face, for the first time since Hydra took him, finally seemed at peace. There was not burden or guilt weighing down on his shoulders, as they were slumped. His breathing was at a tranquil pace, not uneven with nightmares or fear. His eyes were bright and brilliant, admiring the water with no trace of worry for what once was and what was to come._

_Steve could have cried over the gorgeous sight._

_“Steve, I feel at home. I think I’m finally getting better.” Bucky looked at Steve with such enthusiasm and happiness it could have lit up the whole sky. In fact, it did light up Steve’s sky._

_“You know, I’d build a whole new world for you, so you’d never have to be reminded of this one. You’d never have to be consumed with your feelings ever again.” Steve entwined their fingers together, and Bucky gave a gentle squeeze._

_“I don’t need a new world, you’re in this one” Bucky gave Steve a small smile, but it was still there. It wasn’t often Bucky opened up like this. Steve didn’t blame him, after all he had been through. He wasn’t sure if Bucky would ever heal, but this was looking promising. Either way, he’d always be on Bucky’s side, there was no debate about that. He’d follow Bucky right through hell. They both knew that._

_Bucky’s voice broke through Steve’s thoughts._

_“Plus, I don’t mind being overwhelmed with emotion sometimes. I mean, when it’d bad it’s brutal. But when it’s good, it’s amazing. Like right now, I am consumed by my complete and total pure love for you” Bucky leaned back against the bench, and looked up at the sky, content._

_Steve knew right then and there why he had spent his life dedicated to finding Bucky, to protecting Bucky, to saving Bucky._

_“James” Steve said, nerves racking his voice. He hoped Bucky didn’t notice, but of course he did._

_“Yes sweetie? Are you okay?” Bucky cocked his head to one side, a look of concern breaking through the relaxed expression on his face._

_“I have never been better, and will never be better” Steve said with confidence, knowing it was the truth. Bucky made him want to be a better man._

_Bucky moved in close, and brought his soft lips to Steve’s. Bucky’s hands were caressing Steve’s face, while Steve was holding onto Bucky’s hair as if he may drown in their passionate kiss._

_“Marry me, James Buchanan Barnes, please”_

_Steve manages to get out between the kisses instead of taking breaths._

_“Wha- what?” Bucky pushes away immediately, and freezes._

_Steve stops breathing for a moment, not knowing what will happen next._

_Bucky has to say yes, doesn’t he? He can’t say no, he just can’t._

_Time stops for a moment._

_“Did you just say please when asking me to marry you? Well, technically you didn’t even ask. More like demanded” Bucky smirked, then swung his head back in laughter._

_“Well exactly. I didn’t want to tell you. I want you to want to marry me too, so I added the please” Steve explained, trying not to laugh along with Bucky. He failed._

_“Captain America, the famous Steve Rogers, wants to marry me? Huh” Bucky clicks his tongue, pretending to ponder the idea._

_“Yes, Steve, yes. Fuck yes. Yes. I will marry you. I want to marry you” Bucky exclaims, jumping into Steve’s arms._

_“We gotta start planning soon. And we have to invite Sam” Steven says through his beaming smile._

_“Okay, okay”_

 

 

“I know why the caged bird sings” Bucky replies

Steve stays silent.

“The caged bird sings, because it knows it will be free one day” Bucky smiles, and tears roll down his cheeks one by one.

“Bucky, James, baby” Steve reaches out to nothing, and he knows that. He cannot bear what he is about to hear next, but he knows there is not escaping it this time. Captain America, hell, even the whole damn Avengers team can’t save the day now.

“Let me go Steve”

Now it’s Steve’s turn.

“Okay”

 

 

_“You’re gonna regret this” Tony snaps at Steve, but in his eyes there is sadness._

_“No, I’m not” Steve replies with confidence, “I know what you guys think about him. But it was Hydra, not Bucky”_

_“He’s been through so much, he’s not the same”_

_“He’s still my Bucky, and I’ll never let you get to him. And I’ll never stop fighting for him. Until the day I die” Steve raises his voice, growing angry at having the same conversation with his friends over and over again._

_“You don’t need to do this. No one will think you’re a bad guy, or a bad friend” Tony tried to reason_

_“I need to do this for Bucky. You wouldn’t understand” Steve shrugged_

_“He’ll only hurt you Steve. You have to know that”_

_“I don’t care”_

_“Okay, whatever, Suit yourself” Tony dismisses him with a condescending hand wave, before walking out of the room and leaving Steve alone._

_It still doesn’t stop him from replying “Okay”._


End file.
